Relationship Advice: 3 Common Pitfalls to Avoid for a Healthy Long-Term Relationship

Love relationship advice is for those who found someone to love but find it hard to keep that love alive. Finding someone to love isn’t always easy, witness the tremendous growth in online dating sites designed to make finding love easier; but to maintain the relationship is where the real work comes in.

Whether you found your love interest at a church social, an online venue, or scouring the bar scene, that special someone caught your eye and you were intrigued enough to find out more about him or her.

Chances are, the two of them were putting their “best foot forward,” as they say in their appearance and demeanor, while they were getting to know each other. Over time, not only is it hard to look and act your best, but the familiarity of the relationship can even breed boredom.

Couples who want to maintain the relationship need to connect on a more sincere level than just the superficial beginnings of their meeting and dating. This relationship advice is geared toward transitioning to a long-term, happy, and rewarding relationship for both of you.

There are many pitfalls you can run into as your relationship progresses, and this usually happens slowly enough that you don’t even realize it’s happening. Knowing what to look out for can help you avoid them.

Are here 3 Common Traps You Should Avoid so that you can maintain the spark and attraction between you.

1) Having unrealistic expectations of your partner. When you first meet, you don’t really know much about the other person, but if you’re attracted to them, give them credit for being “perfect”: innocent until proven guilty, you might say.

Over time you will learn their weaknesses and flaws that everyone has and some of these will annoy you. It may even make you angry that he or she is not perfect as you expected.

You must understand that just as they forgive your imperfections, you must forgive theirs. Work on your own character flaws for both your benefit and theirs, no doubt. Don’t be more critical of them than you would like them to be with you.

2) Not communicating effectively. Everyone is wired differently in this, and certainly men are different than women. It will be necessary to give and receive; you both may even need to expand your comfort zone in the way you express your feelings.

Don’t be afraid to talk about your feelings with your partner, especially if something bothers you enough to interfere with your relationship; even making you consider breaking up.

Always do it without confrontation and stay calm, even if he or she doesn’t.

3) Confuse sex with love. Over time you will find that the physical side of the relationship is at odds with the emotional side. They are not the same. Some make the mistake of thinking that a lapse in the bedroom component is a sign that love is no longer strong.

Women and men do not see the same connection between love and sex. Women see one as a way of expressing the other. Men may see sex as an expression of his masculinity and a woman’s interest as an indication of her love for him.

When this issue is confused, it can lead to hurt, anger, and stress in the relationship. That’s when communication should kick in and you both calmly discuss what’s going on in your mind.

Many things change as we age, both physically and with the complexity of our lives. These changes affect each couple differently, and as tensions rise, it takes patience and understanding to work through them.

This is perfectly normal.

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